Adulting, Instagram & Chronic Nostalgia

It’s been hard at times to remember who I AM. Who God has created me to be. After a year of labels, name calling, hate and gas lighting… mentally it has taken a toll. I don’t write this to worry anybody, I will be fine. God is with me through the fire and I know that I have support. I am currently in therapy to work through it. If there is anything that I have learned this past year, is that authenticity is important, invaluable, scarce and it resonates.

I find myself pushing back BIG time on the things that I used to put up with in the past. I am having a hard time with the idea of social media. How the images and messages are isolating and hurting so many to compare themselves and feel inadequate. Nothing about Instagram for me feels good.

The overzealous marketing. The constant need for popularity and growing numbers. It feels like junior high/high school on steroids.

It’s hard enough to go through adolescence and see the popular kids, who from my past experience, are up to no good. They bully, they belittle and they aren’t inclusive. Naively I thought this would go away when I grew up. And maybe people did 20 years ago. But with the explosion of reality tv and social media, I feel like we are all in a second adolescence.

Any I the only one?

We watch drama, gossip & people doing crazy things in order to decompress and entertain ourselves. As a stress relief. We watch people get emotionally abused and rebound in unhealthy ways while eating popcorn and a glass of wine. We are entertained by the bully. So these people grow more and more influential and powerful. Brands align themselves because of the millions that follow them.

I used to laugh and create characters out of people like this because of the sheer ugliness and ridiculousness of the climate. There is no way these people are real, right? There is no way people actually treat and talk to other in this way. And then I got a giant taste of it this year.

Melissa Schuman is a shitstain. She’s a thirst bucket. She’s a fame seeking nobody. A Homophobe. She’s an Amber Hussy.

Good God people! This is borderline equivalent to what I hear spewed on my son’s playground. You’re a loser! You can’t play! OR (You can’t “sit” with us.)

GROW UP! GROW UP! It’s not called adulting, it’s called you’re a grown person. So take off your Mickey Mouse ears and your Grinch pajamas because your 25+!!!

ANd NO you cannot trick or treat! Go to CVS and buy your own bag on candy. And when my husband refuses to give you said, Tootsie Roll, you don’t get to call him a racist.

I get it. It’s nice to be nostalgic but it’s not healthy to not accept reality in the midst of it.

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