For the first 2 weeks, I shook. I cried. I barely ate. No longer being able to depend on denial as a coping mechanism was gone. I was out. Everyone knew. I woke up every morning anticipating the next brave woman who would speak out and stand with me.
What came next was a barrage of hatred, bullying and victim shaming. On the flip side, countless emails and DM’s from victims desperate to tell me their story. Stories that only a few of us know. Countless people who know my assailant and what he has done to many others also fear to speak up. They fear the repercussions.
Nobody wants to be me because my abuser has received no backlash.
Is it because Harvey Weinstein or Mario Batalli haven’t been adorned on people’s childhood bedroom walls? Is it because he is young and considered desirable by his fans that he can get away with such atrocities?
“Liar! Liar! Liar!”- #ISTANDWITHNICK
All he had to do is claim it’s consensual and that’s enough for some people. Is it so impossible to believe that I never wanted to do anything sexually with him because so many women do? I’ve considered that I may be the only woman to have ever said “no” to him.
No, I’m not the only one. And I know because I’ve been contacted.
I know why. Because of fear. Fear of him. Fear of his machine. Those who support him. Fear of how he will accuse THEM of being a liar too.
But we ALL can’t be liars.
This blog below attempts to make a case that I am, in fact, a liar.
The Curious Case of Melissa Schuman written by Sara Taylor on the blog What Happen’s On The Backstreet.
It’s a gem. Cherry picked information designed to create a narrative that fits what best defends him. Has anyone else noticed she’s an editor for his website NickCarter.net? That sells his merchandise. Who had a vested capital interest in how my story might expose him?
Nick Carter owns the Copyright. Powered by Wonderful Union. A merch company.
Is it possible that Nick Carter and his team are responsible for orchestrating this attack against me?
Interesting. Sara Taylor seems to be based out of Nashville. Wonder Union also seems to have an office there.
“Slut. You wanted it!”- #ISTANDWITHNICK
Sharna Burgess This blog you emphatically encourage people to read and declare “KNOW THE FACTS” is not unbiased. It has an agenda. You should know that your defense of Nick not only further victimizes me but that your part of the problem.
How am I supposed to fight against such blatant hatred? How does any person fight against someone with more power than them? I don’t have a fancy PR team or an army of adoring fans to defend me and silence the other side.
As of now, I only have my voice. I will refuse to be intimidated and afraid despite the accusations from the other side.
I understand I am not required to answer the questions addressed in the What Happens On The Backstreet Blog. I owe answers to nobody. But then I think about all the others who are still too frightened to say something and that makes me want to be brave for them.
I have decided to address the questions brought up to support those who need that extra nudge of encouragement to come forward. The backlash will come but you don’t need to fear it.
“Why did you follow him on Twitter?”- #ISTANDWITHNICK
I followed a lot of people on Twitter that I wasn’t even aware of. It wasn’t a social platform that I used constantly or even understood it’s power and influence.
Many times I would click on the profiles that Twitter would “suggested” I follow. Why? Because I didn’t think it was a big deal.
If you “follow” someone on social media it doesn’t mean you “follow” them. I think we all know that just because you “don’t” follow someone on social media, doesn’t mean you “don’t” follow them.
He was cast as a judge on Boyband. Yes, I was previously hoping to be considered for that project too. I didn’t know Nick was attached to the project until a fan on my Instagram Livestream brought it up. I didn’t have the privilege to be honest. How was I supposed to react when they told me his Dad died? When they brought up Aaron?
I had been publicly acting like nothing happened between the two of us for over a decade. I was supportive of the concept of the project because of it’s potential for a spin-off, “GirlBand”.
I had to learn to have compassion for him. After many years of therapy I have learned that “hurt people hurt people” and because of this, I could try to move past what he did to me.
Forgiveness and compassion became my cornerstone and was my only outlet to cope aside from denial.
My husband @BrandonHenschel was tagged in her tweet. It’s the only reason I “liked” the tweet.
“Why would you forgive your rapist?”- #ISTANDWITHNICK
If you look back on my “condolences” tweet, you will see my response was nearly 10 years after the assault. The statute of limitations was up. This was my way of relying on forgiveness and compassion as I was convinced he would never be held accountable.
I never thought I would speak out about what he did to me and this tweet would be used to ultimately villainize me.
She Needs To Become Important…On The Internet. -#ISTANDWITHNICK
Over the past 5 years, I have been focusing on my comedy sitcom and improv chops. The video below was my first attempt at writing a satirical piece on the ludicrousness of social media.
I was reflecting on how the industry was changing. The need to be popular or trending on Vine or even Instagram seemed ridiculous to me.
I even made fun of myself and my group Dream without realizing we would eventually get back together years later on the My2K Tour in 2016. After 15 years of being apart, how could I possibly had the foresight that this video would be used against me, attempting to use it out of context, as evidence of needing to be relevant again.
What matters is the truth. You, the silenced victim, know the truth. I know the truth. Remember that truth is our best defense.
No matter the cost, I am proud to be on the right side of history and I hope you will join me too. Speaking out against sexual violence, assault and abuse are so important.
It’s also important to consider not only ourselves but others. To live a life well lived. And I believe we are all being called. Called to stand up, speak out and to not be afraid. Not just for our own sake but for the sake of our children and our children’s children.
It’s not about me, it’s about the moral principle and responsibility as a human to stand up against injustice and abuse. I will stand firm for the others. In your silence, as you struggle to find your way, your voice, your courage.
Know that your story matters. You matter. You deserve to be heard and seen and validated. And don’t be shaken when they scream,
“Liar! Liar! Liar!”
Need help finding your voice? RAINN can help.
Call 800.656.HOPE (4673) to be connected with a trained staff member from a sexual assault service provider in your area.
How does it work?
When you call 800.656.HOPE (4673), you’ll be routed to a local RAINN affiliate organization based on the first six digits of your phone number. Cell phone callers have the option to enter the ZIP code of their current location to more accurately locate the nearest sexual assault service provider.
How can the hotline help me?
Calling the National Sexual Assault Hotline gives you access to a range of free services including:
- Confidential support from a trained staff member
- Support finding a local health facility that is trained to care for survivors of sexual assault and offers services like sexual assault forensic exams
- Someone to help you talk through what happened
- Local resources that can assist with your next steps toward healing and recovery
- Referrals for long term support in your area
- Information about the laws in your community
- Basic information about medical concerns